01-08-2010 17:34     
 
Some Assembly Required
 
By Hyon O'Brien

At most of the Christmases our family has enjoyed over the years, there has always been at least one item that came a big box with a notice reading, ``Some assembly required." When I receive such an item, I inwardly groan because of my innate klutziness when it comes to putting anything together.

This ``some assembly required" phrase came into my mind recently as I listened to the message of the pastor who officiated the wedding of my college friend's daughter. It lingered in my mind for days afterwards. What he said to the new couple was more or less this: ``So far in your lives, both of you have had the blessing of having loving parents who have showered you with love and looked after you with tender care. Well, that's over now. You have to begin to think and act like independent adults and start a life united in this effort with God at the center. You no longer can run to your parents each time you have trouble. You now have a package called marriage that you have to put together. Like a household item that you pick up from a store that requires assembly, you need to work together to make your marriage a workable unit."

What an accurate analogy to illustrate what it will take for them to create a successful new life together!

Indeed, God has given us raw material to work with. He doesn't assemble it for us. He doesn't deprive us of our individual duty to participate in the work of building a unit together.

As John Donne (1572-1631), the English clergyman and poet, said, ``No man is an island, entirely of itself … and therefore never send to know for whom the bell tolls; it tolls for thee."

This refers to the human condition that we are all interconnected with one another and need interaction with others to have a real and full life.

The great assembler Henry Ford (1863-1947) once said, ``Coming together is a beginning. Keeping together is progress. Working together is success." In the context of marriage, a wedding is a coming together, the beginning of a life together. While being loyal and faithful to each other, the effort of continuous learning and loving is a process of working together for the common goal of making the marriage a success. I see the whole thing as a procedure of assembly. As orchestra members together make a symphony, the two partners in a marriage need to work diligently together so that the package will be well-assembled and ready for use.

The ``some assembly is required" philosophy can be applied to other situations as well. On a personal level, one can look at life as a work in progress and undertake the job of assembly with steadfastness. With constant reading and reflection, the inner person can grow to be a greatly improved package at the end of the road.

On the job as well, one can retain this attitude of assembly. How can I help my company to reassemble itself into a more desirable state? What is lacking for the company to be a working unit? Are any screws missing or loose? Do I have the picture of the completed item? Am I contributing to this company as a good component?

As citizens, we need to ask ourselves: Do I perhaps regard myself only as the recipient of benefits from others' efforts? Am I seeking out the places where I need to contribute for our society to be a better place? Can I influence others to work together as a team to improve our society? Am I too critical of other people's assembling jobs while doing nothing myself to help out? Where can I fill in a gap? What do I need to do to help sustain our world?

As a nation, we need to consider our country as a global builder helping to make the world better place. It is so wonderful that Korea now belongs to the group of countries that help out countries in need of aid. As Korea has been given so much generous support by others over the years, it is exciting that we are finally starting to do our part in lifting other countries to function better. They, in turn, can help out other yet-to-be whole countries.

So in 2010, let's look around and get going on all levels of our life to be at the assembly line working to assemble a package for betterment of our world. Let's pick up that screw driver, read that manual, look at the picture of finished product and get to work.

Yes, we can do it if we work together. We can help out in our neighborhood and help the homeless to be reintegrated into society; we can encourage lonely elderly people in nursing homes; we can reduce noise pollution, visual pollution, air pollution and ultimately tackle the climate change problems we face; we can radically change our attitude of 'keeping up with Joneses' and relax and enjoy our life in a real way. We can eliminate the self-interested, self-focused way of looking at things and begin to see things with an eye to the ``common good."

Remember that we are in this thing together. We must work together to assemble the package of life, the global package, and the human package.

Some assembly is still required, but the finished product will be beautiful!

Hyon O'Brien, a former reference librarian in the United States, has returned to Korea after 32 years of living abroad. She can be reached at hyonobrien@gmail.com.